What coffee would you/your show be, and why?

Double espresso with a lot of sugar. Something about espresso presents a challenge, it’s bitter, it’s dark, it keeps you awake at night, yet somehow it seems like a taste of reality. The drinker of double espressos, like many of my audience members, often asks, why do I keep doing this to myself” and the answer is, the sugar. Somehow, dissolved in all the bitter acrimony and blackness of coffee is an unspeakable sweetness. And that’s reality.

How will the audience remember you the morning after?

The audience has no need to remember me at all, however, if the play is successful it will have connected with the audience in a way that feels meaningful and intimate. They will not remember me, but they will remember the specific combination of pathos, irony, absurdity and hope, that is the moral universe in which the characters of the play exist. And that moral universe will feel like a new home.

What do you/your show do to make an audience’s heart beat faster?

Easy! My character stalks them with a high voltage, garish anthropoid neon marionette made of glass and loose wires. Then I ask them embarrassing questions about their most intimate private lives.

About the show

Funny Guy

Date(s): Aug 2-10, 12-17, 19-24

Time(s): 17:20 (55 minutes)

Location: Greenside @ George Street – Lime Studio

How will the audience remember you the morning after?

Unlike anything they’ve seen before. Something they should tell that one friend to go see who likes really dumb stuff. Also kinda needy.

What brings a nice show like yours to a place like the Edinburgh Fringe?

We’re both raging neurotics with a desperation for attention, so we wanted to see if we could mainline pure anxiety for an entire month. Also, we love that there’s a room for everything at the Fringe. Maybe even a whack absurdist narrative sketch show like us. 👉👈

What misconceptions do you think people have about you/your show – would you like to clear them up?

We are NOT dating each other. We’ve tried it and we didn’t like it. But we’ll share crushes when necessary.

About the show

We Forgive You, Patina Pataznik

Date(s): Jul 31 Aug 1-18, 20-26

Time(s): 18:20 (1 hour)

Location: Gilded Balloon Patter House – The Penny

How do you keep your performances fresh every night?

To keep fresh, I start by reminding myself how my washing powder handles it, which currently just involves mixing it with Febreze. So, I do that, wang a bit of ylang-ylang round, topped with some mint and a spritz of lemon, and place each audience member in their own human-sized Tupperware container. Makes the show a bit muffled, but they stay fresh throughout

What misconceptions do you think people have about you/your show – would you like to clear them up?

My entire show is about misconceptions; how we judge people based solely off their appearance. So, I’m hoping my show can putbut a spotlight on that and get us laughing about it. I think one of the biggest misconceptions people have about me in particular, is that I dislike them when they first meet me. Which is obviously so ridiculous. I do in fact dislike ALL people, equally at all times. Don’t ever feel it’s just you being singled out

How will the audience remember you the morning after?

Well, there is of course the audience being branded with a hot iron cast of my face as they leave my show. It still stings a little the morning after, so they should remember me from that. Otherwise, I of course do my morning rounds the next day, going round door to door holding a silver closch containing an array of pastries….the pastries being used to energise me as I go door to door and not for the audience member, obviously.

About the show

Louise Atkinson: She’s Got The Look

Date(s): Aug 1-25

Time(s): 17:00 (1 hour)

Location: Gilded Balloon Patter House – Coorie

What misconceptions do you think people have about you/your show – would you like to clear them up?

That we lip sync songs….nope, it’s all live singing for us!!

What coffee would you/your show be, and why?

Long black with the hint of vanilla. The show is dark, smokey but with a confusing sweet twist

What brings a nice show like yours to a place like the Edinburgh Fringe?

We’re on a great adventure from the land down under! This is our second year coming to Edi from Australia, it makes us feel like we’re in a fairytale.

About the show

VILLAINS: A Dizney in Drag Parody

Date(s): Aug 2, 4-5, 9, 11, 14, 16, 18, 21, 23, 25

Time(s): 22:35 (1 hour)

Location: Assembly George Square – Gordon Aikman Theatre

What do you/your show do to make an audience’s heart beat faster?

21Common are dance agitators creating spectacular experiences. We hijack audiences’ expectations; leaving them exhilarated, appalled, motivated, disturbed; it’s all good. Our job is to hold their attention for 60 minutes. Our work is our autobiography, our way of being and living and we will dance until we die (plus it features a lot of Patsy Cline and uncontrollable rave dancing….)

How do you keep your performances fresh every night?

This show blends human endurance, iconoclastic references, pop culture/ pop preoccupations, risk and real or perceived danger therefore it requires A LOT of deodorant (definitely LYNX with a few bottles of Impulse thrown in), wet wipes and in some instances talcum powder to keep our relentless performances fragrant.

How will the audience remember you the morning after?

They’ll remember the dulcet thuds of Cotton Eyed Joe and DJ Casper interspersed with cheese puff and processed ham sandwiches, a well-thumbed copy of Great Expectations, overflowing ashtrays, a spider man duvet that smells of hot dogs and a lot of furious creatures going hell for leather in a dingey living room of doom…..

About the show

Common Is As Common Does: A Memoir

Date(s): Aug 2-10, 13-17

Time(s): 12:30 (1 hour)

Location: ZOO Southside – Main House

What coffee would you/your show be, and why?

An espresso, cause I’m dark short & hit you like cocaine.

What misconceptions do you think people have about you/your show – would you like to clear them up?

That I’m trying too hard to appease to the far right, & that I’m trying too hard to appease the woke left. I’m just trying to make some good comedy & inspire people to be proud of whoever they are.

If you/your show were a school subject what would you/it be and why?

History. I’m a fountain of knowledge about things that happened cause it’s easier than dealing with things that are happening.

About the show

Raul Kohli: Raul Britannia

Date(s): Aug 1-11, 13-25

Time(s): 18:30 (1 hour)

Location: Just the Tonic at Cabaret Voltaire – Just the Liberty Room

If you/your show were a school subject what would you/it be and why?

Criminology because Alice Diamond and her Forty Elephants were the leaders of London’s Crime World in the 1920s!

What coffee would you/your show be, and why?

An Americano because the show is dark and mysterious, full of twists and turns!

What do you/your show do to make an audience’s heart beat faster?

Bring out the Big guns, literally. Lots of violence and confrontation to get the audience sitting on the edge of their seats.

About the show

Alice Diamond and the Forty Elephants

Date(s): Aug 1-11

Time(s): 13:30 (1 hour)

Location: Pleasance Dome – King Dome

What misconceptions do you think people have about you/your show – would you like to clear them up?

I think the title of the show makes people expect a slutty and scandalous evening at the theatre. I would NOT like to clear up this misconception. In fact, feel free to spread that rumour far and wide. But between you and me, the show is woefully innocent.

If you/your show were a school subject what would you/it be and why?

I would probably be recess. I think you call it playtime in the UK? Not because I’m cool, I’m more that kind of recess where you go hide in the library and help the elderly librarian organise the Charlotte Brontë junior books and maybe cry because you haven’t hit puberty yet and everyone else somehow has.

How will the audience remember you the morning after?

Well, I’ll probably text them two seconds after they leave asking when I can see them next (with an “I think I love you” thrown in for good measure). I want to ensure I’m always on their mind. And most of all, I hope that they follow me on Instagram and then we can spend the rest of our lives sending each other memes when we’re feeling silly and Sylvia Plath quotes when we’re full of existential yearning…

About the show

Wyld Woman: The Legend of Shy Girl

Date(s): Aug 2-11, 13-18, 20-25

Time(s): 16:00 (1 hour)

Location: Assembly Rooms – Drawing Room

What brings a nice show like yours to a place like the Edinburgh Fringe?

Despite our best efforts, people keep asking us to do the show in their posh venues, and who are we to say no? Also there’s a lack of Queer Pirates generally, and especially in Edinburgh, so we’re just balancing it out by coming up

How do you keep your performances fresh every night?

We definitely don’t improvise a lot of the lines *shakes papers and looks shiftily away* and we definitely DON’T do dares on stage, like getting Diana The Musical references in or playing tig (please don’t tell our Director)

What misconceptions do you think people have about you/your show – would you like to clear them up?

Because we’re a punk rock gig musical about polyamorous queer pirates, people seem to think we’re actually very cool people – but we mostly wrote the show over cups of tea while crocheting and we’re all in bed in matching pjs by 10pm Also we don’t actually get our tits out during the show….or do we?….maybe…..I dunno, maybe buy a ticket and find out…

About the show

Tit Swingers

Date(s): Jul 31 Aug 1-6, 8-13, 15-20, 22-26

Time(s): 13:40 (1 hour)

Location: Pleasance Courtyard – Pleasance Two

What do you/your show do to make an audience’s heart beat faster?

A reviewer once described the show as ‘just the right amount of raunch’ and another went out of their way to praise my impression of a ‘horny snail’. I’m actually always amazed by how many people say that my snail impression makes them swoon! Honestly, between the snail, the seahorse daddy and the sexy burlesque mushroom, I think there’s something in the show to make everyones heart race a little.

How do you keep your performances fresh every night?

One of the things I love about drag and cabaret is that the audience are much more involved in the show than in my experience of traditional theatre. Rules are there to be broken and it’s so alive, reactive and spontaneous. Some of my all time favourite moments in the show have come from mistakes. One of the shows at Soho Theatre, I lost my shoes and did the show in my socks. I’ve lost count of how many times my top or shorts have fallen down…

What misconceptions do you think people have about you/your show – would you like to clear them up?

I think a lot of people come in not really knowing what to expect – which I love! One audience member a while ago thought they were coming to a lecture about queer ecology, so they were extremely confused when I waddled onstage in a penguin costume…

About the show

Bi-Curious George

Date(s): Jul 31 Aug 1-11, 13-26

Time(s): 16:15 (1 hour)

Location: Pleasance Dome – 10 Dome